The 2015 is Coming!

Being Britney Spears.

Now that Christmas is over, it's that dreaded time of year where I feel obligated to make up some New Year's resolutions and then justify why I didn't do the ones fully from the year before. In 2012, I survived the apocalypse, and then felt capable of bettering myself in 5 ways. In 2013, I didn't feel like making up new resolutions, but I looked back at the year and focused on the random things I did in lieu of the dumb resolutions. This year, I'm too mentally exhausted and/or clinically unstable to do any of these things, so I turned to the Internet for help in finding resolutions I won't keep, but might make a half-decent article.

One of my Facebook friends recently shared an Elite Daily article, "21 Realistic New Year's Resolutions 20-somethings Should Strive For"  by Paul Hudson. This article is perfect for me since this will be my last New Year's Eve as a 21 year old and I love trusting the quality of articles with titles that end with prepositions. Not all 21 of them are relevant for my life, such as communicating effectively and making others happy. Those are already accomplished with The Cackling Hen's existence, right? Right? But I wing-pecked a few to look like I'm making resolutions.

"Only keep those individuals in your life who deserve to be there." This one's easy. Social media and the Internet do that for me. People who follow The Hen clearly are great birds with great taste and deserve to be in my life. Non-followers...well, thankfully they're not in my life because they're making poor choices. But I would like more followers, so tell your friends about The Cackling Hen.

"Learn to make your own decisions." Don't I already do this? I'll keep being stubborn too just to be safe.

"Spend less time on lovers that will never transition into life partners." I'm struggling with this one and bringing it to my own life. Should I reevaluate my relationship with One Direction, all of them? I don't want to, and who's to say they won't eventually become life partners? Yes, all 5 of them. 

Writer's block since 1989.

"Finish what you started - and don't start things that aren't worth finishing." Dammit, this brings me back to my unfinished novel. Two years ago, I hoped I could work on it daily. Today, I can't remember the last time I opened the file. (I assume it's still there.) I still plan to publish at least one book in my lifetime, but apparently I wasn't meant to be a novelist prodigy in my early 20s. To justify my lack of novel writing in these youthful years, I'll point to higher education, stardom with Hens on Ice, thankless and countless hours writing The Cackling Hen, and family health emergencies as a few scapegoats. Maybe 2015 will bring some new life into my novelist career, but I'm not making any written resolution. 2014 wasn't a good year for it, nor was 2013. (or 2012, or 1999) But I vow for a release prior to 2100. It's feasible, and if it doesn't work out, I'll be too old and tired to care.

Happy 2015, Hen readers! I wish you a year filled with good health, happy times, and new Hen articles.

Keep reading! Merry Clucking Christmas!