Hot Air and Deflated Balls in Today's News

Footballs.

Breaking: Brady's Balls "Perfect."

Hen articles typically don't get too sporty. I've come to accept that no one cares about the ever-bumbling Buccaneers, and that's where my professional sports loyalties begin and end. However, in the past few days I have not been able to sip my coffee or turn on the TV without getting blindsided with "news" about the inflation level of balls.

As if it wasn't bad enough that a press conference with the Patriots' coach was breaking news on CNN, today the story is the cover story for all of USA Today, a slightly-respected national newspaper! I'm paying as little attention as possible to this "scandal," but as a conscious bird, apparently I have no choice but to have it all thrown in my face.

I Just Want a Sidewalk!

Searching for sass.

This year's Hens on Ice tour is a mixed bag of prominent North American cities and "What state is that in again?" towns. However, lots of low-expectation towns have yielded pleasant surprises, like Lincoln and Des Moines (sorry, Fresno). Arriving into Allentown, PA, I had high hopes to be on par with Lincoln, Des Moines, or at least Moline.

My first morning in town, I followed my routine of pecking around the area to find local hot spots - coffee shops, restaurants, bars, parks, bookstores with cats, or anything similar. But in lieu of being in a downtown setting, we are a stone's throw from a major highway, the local airport, and "Condoms Galore." In spite of a different setting and planes rattling my window, I was optimistic to find some local sass in Allentown. Ten feet into the journey, I gave up on local sass and just hoped for a sidewalk.