Hens Say Dumb Things

Hens say dumb things. In the midst of all the noise we make with our beaks - some brilliant, lots ordinary - all of us have our gaffes where our brans disconnect just long enough for crazy to fly out. The current president says windmills cause cancer and grandma's racist friend wants minority groups to have their own states. These are extreme examples of spoken blunders, but some things (both examples) should never be said.

"Windmills cause cancer."

As a flying hen, I talk to a lot of people every day as part of my job, or just functioning as a social bird. Between passengers and coworkers, my beak can be exhausted by the end of the day. Somewhere in our social development, many of us have become uncomfortable with silence or short exchanges, so many hens fill that void with stupid comments.

Learning to Fly: This is Not the Ice Show!

It's been a whirlwind of life again since quitting my second job of 2017.  Although I've proven unsuccessful at quitting ice skating, I'm now a pro at quitting soul-sucking office jobs. Since flapping away from office job attempt #2, I returned to the ice show, lost a grandma, and took a flying leap of faith into an entirely new career path. Free time and humor have been sparse, but the universe can't cluck me out yet! In fact, my new career makes too much sense in retrospect: I've learned to fly.

The World's Most Brilliant Airport

Give me a window seat!

I used to think I liked traveling. I've told people this many times. But now that I travel weekly with Hens on Ice, I've learned that I really just like seeing new places. The act of traveling from point A to B typically makes me want to pull out all my feathers and/or cry. But arriving in Stockholm, Sweden today after some cackles and cries, I witnessed something amazing I never thought I'd be alive to see.

I've observed many common behaviors in people brought out through traveling. After being through countless airports, my patience for poor travel etiquette and behavior is at zero. We turn into a different breed at airports. Suddenly, people are either aggressive, rude, and impatient, or they act as if they have no concept of how an airport functions. I want all these people out of my way because I want to get to point B so I can say I like traveling.

Your Seat Only Reclines Three Inches

I just can't get comfortable.

There are many reasons to hate air travel. If the airlines or airports aren't obnoxious enough, plenty of our traveling peers also turn inhumane once they are dumped off at the airport curb. Traveling with Hens on Ice, we've had many international flights and I've gotten more experience observing the travel day pecking order. People who treat the airplane like their living rooms are one special breed of travelers.