January 22, 2017

My New Job, My Old Job

To-do list.
As I wrote in the two-part series, "I Quit," I'm not good at quitting. Maybe it's a fear of change or maybe I actually like ice skating, but I'm just not good at quitting unless I'm physically forced out of it. School makes you "graduate" and jobs "fire" you, but otherwise, I stick it out. Even if some friendships turn henemy, I can't let go until they block my number and social media accounts.

This past week was one of new beginnings and wonderful new endings. I accomplished a life-long goal: I quit!


Day 1:
Lots to learn.
Tuesday morning began with promise. I got up with the roosters crowing and drove to the first day of my new, full-time job as an online teacher. I began as expected, filling out hours of paper work and shaking with nerves and coffee. I then awaited an office tour that never came, which wasn't a huge deal until I got lost searching for a bathroom or outhouse.

Once I found my way back, it was time to start training. But who would train me? That seemed like a tough question, as my "boss" plodded around the office, looking for someone who could deal with me so he could get back to his coffee. Finally, we found poor Eddie, working hard in a dimly-lit room, startled by our entrance and having to train someone.

Eddie was very nice and helpful, but also stiff (personality-wise and physically) and bland. It was a harsh new reality after spending a week in Vegas and two months doing an ice show. I took a deep breath, reminding myself this is how normal life is. I could still be crazy on the weekends...except I'd be working nights and weekends. Shoot.

After watching a Power Point slideshow, I had 6 hours left to shadow current workers, since no one had created an account for me yet to train. But this gave me a great opportunity to observe and learn from birds doing my future job.

My first coworker was a nice man named Bob, typing away, wearing a stained t-shirt and shorts, while munching on some pizza. I had heard of casual Fridays in offices, but this was beyond casual and it was Tuesday. At first, this seemed great; I loved dressing casually at the ice show. But then I realized this was no ice show. There were no nicer costumes. There was no music. No one was having fun.

My new friend.
My next coworker was a lovely gal named Frannie who simply grunted instead of speaking when Eddie asked if I could shadow her. We took it as a "yes." Frannie was quieter than Bob, who had been very helpful talking me through what he did. I didn't want to disturb Frannie's work, but after about 30 minutes of waiting for her to speak while her wings clacked the keyboard, I broke the ice.
"So, how long have you been here, Frannie?"
"Since 7:30."
*Silence*
"Oh, did you mean today, or working here?" Frannie asked.
"I mean, either." I sputtered. And that was our conversation until her shift ended at 4:00.
My supervisors left punctually at 5:00 without bidding farewell, so I slithered out around 5:10. My head was throbbing, I was cross-eyed, my neck hurt, my heart beat funnily once or twice, but I survived my first day!

Day 2:
Day 2.
I woke up a little more tired and a little less eager, but I was ready for day 2! When I arrived, no one else was quite ready for my day 2. I couldn't log into anything yet to continue training, and the supervisors all had meetings for the first 2 hours of the day. So I got to shadow my friend Frannie a little more, inadvertently learning how to use the coffee machine and that texting on the job is fine.

After the morning meetings and quality time with Frannie, I finally got some real practice for my job! I got a true taste for what I'd be doing each day, and this is where the dread started to settle in. I lost focus after about an hour of working at the computer, and caught myself zoning out or possibly sleeping with my eyes open. As my headache grew and my attention waned, my mind wondered about how to appear busy without working, how/when I could possibly quit, and alternative career paths.

At this point, I noticed a fellow trainee, also on his day 2. He was still focused and engaged while I was dozing off. While I pretended to look busy, he was chatting with a supervisor on his free time, trying to learn more. I thought to myself that I should be doing this too. I should talk to this supervisor and learn more too, or I should talk to someone else working. Instead, going against all logic, I went back to sleeping with my eyes open, daydreaming about my escape route. I left at 5:00, and my escape was pretty simple: through the front door.

I drove home through rush hour traffic, near tears at times, head throbbing, neck aching, and heart having a few more abnormal beats. I'd quickly gotten a true taste of the job, and my favorite part of the day was sitting in traffic, listening to the radio. I knew that might be a problem.

I went to bed accepting the fact that I had the power to quit. No one was forcing me to go into that office the next day, and it was far from my only job option. It wasn't a bad job and the folks weren't bad birds. But I couldn't stay with a job where the only perks for me were dressing like a slob and snacking at my desk. The job wasn't the right fit for a mildly insane, slightly tipsy, cackling, skating, show chick. I accepted this after my first sip of coffee at 7:00 a.m. on day 3 and wrote a resignation e-mail.

From the moment I quit, I felt a huge burden lifted from my soul. I was happy again. I was myself again. The world had endless hope and promise (minus the U.S. presidency) again. I was great again! I vowed I would truly quit, unlike in figure skating, and never return! Then my supervisor e-mailed me, requesting I bring my key back to the office that day.


KEEP READING! "Hen for President and My New Careers!"
"In Zayn We Trust"


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